Subject: SMML VOL 2046 Date: Sat, 07 Dec 2002 01:59:55 +1100 SMML is proudly sponsored by SANDLE http://sandlehobbies.com ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- MODELLERS INDEX 1: Re: The Monitors guns 2: Re: Scale relativities 3: Japanese Midget subs at Pearl Harbor 4: HOW TO SIMULATE BEING A SAILOR 5: ex HMAS Jervis Bay 6: Re: Accuracy of the ship's plans (or accuracy of condemnation of ship plans) 7: Re: Decal Paper -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- TRADERS, ANNOUNCEMENTS & NOTICEBOARD INDEX 1: WTB: Airfix 1/72 Vosper 2: 1/400 Hoods 3: Re: Allied Coastal Forces V1 & V2.... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- MODELLERS ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1) From: "David T. Okamura" Subject: Re: The Monitors guns From: Andreas Bergauer >> Sorry, but I have to disagree with some of you about the port stoppers: Two passages in the book of James Tertius deKay (Monitor: The story of the civil war ironclad and the man whose invention changed the course of history) sound as if both port stoppers could be raised simultaneously << Andreas, my own research tends to support your contention that the Monitor crew could open both gunport covers at the same time, though this was a hasty modification right before the Battle of Hampton Roads. However, both guns could not be moved forward into firing position at the same time, so it would be incorrect to have both cannons sticking out of the turret, or both drawn in with shutters closed. One should always be withdrawn and the other sticking out. One wonders if an open gunport contributed to the Monitor's floundering, or whether the crew had packed around the cannon to make the opening somewhat watertight. Later monitors remedied this design flaw. David T. Okamura ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2) From: Lou Meszaros Subject: Re: Scale relativities We actually did have a member build a working scale PT boat in 1/144th. I can send pictures if anyone is interested. Very nicely detailed, and looked like a water-bug moving around the larger ships. Lou ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3) From: Richard Sweeney Subject: Japanese Midget subs at Pearl Harbor Hello Burl. Thank You for the Notice on this show, I look forward to seeing it. I just hope they do not persue the abusrdity of one particular quote: "This discovery is the first physical evidence to back up what numerous historians have long believed-America fired first in the War with Japan." Do these "Historians" like to debate known facts???? There is no question the USS Ward fired upon the Midget sub before the Declared opening of hostilities between the United States and the Empire of Japan. No attempt has ever been made to deny that it happened. But the bigger question by far is not "Did the United States fire the first shot at Pearl Harbor?" But more importantly, "If it was not the intent of the Imperial Government of Japan to commence Hostilities with the United States through an attack upon our Pacific Fleet in American Territorial Waters, Then why did they have a small fleet of very short range armed submarines attempting to enter the restricted waters of a major American Naval Base?" Further more it begs the question do these historians also wish to suggest that the Japanese Naval Air Force, already in the air and headed toward Pearl Harbor and other targets on Oahu at the time the USS Ward engaged it's target, was simply a response to our anticipated sinking of a Japanese Midget sub, which failed to stop and surface when challenged by one of our ships on patrol in defense of the fleet. I propose that Japan fired the first shot, albeit figuratively when they signalled their forces to commence with the attack on Pearl Harbor. Any expenditure of ammunition by us after those orders were issued, was purely incidental. I know there are those mis-guided "Historians" (and I DO use the word Loosely) that are still for some unknown reason trying to argue that WWII in the Pacific was a "War of American Imperialism". A truely upsurd concept, that denies that the United States was physically attacked in all of it's Pacific possessions, by the Japanese, and most of those attacks took place with in a period of one week. It also, by logic, should demand to know what major additions to our holdongs in the Pacific we gained through this "War of Imperialism", when infact we took ownership of nothing that was not ours before the war, and have given some of those possessions their independence(IE: the Phillipines, which were already scheduled to become independent around the time the war broke out, But became a possession of Imperial Japan until re-liberated by the forces of the United States. Another question to those "Historians" might also be, Since we did defeat Japan, With the help of our Allies, Why did we not simply make it a permenant territory of the United States, rather than rebuild it and allow it to become a World economic power? If we intended to keep it, why did we allow the Emperor to continue as the head of the government, and re-establish a parliment (the Diet) almost immediately? It will be interesting to see what this show has to say in regards to these Issues. Thanks Again. Richard Sweeney ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 4) From: Burl Burlingame Subject: HOW TO SIMULATE BEING A SAILOR HOW TO SIMULATE BEING A SAILOR: 1. Buy a steel dumpster, paint it gray inside and out, and live in it for six months. 2. Run all the pipes and wires in your house exposed on the walls. 3. Repaint your entire house every month. 4. Renovate your bathroom. Build a wall across the middle of the bathtub and move the shower head to chest level. When you take showers, make sure you turn off the water while you soap down. 5. Put lube oil in your humidifier and set it on high. 6. Once a week, blow compressed air up your chimney,making sure the wind carries the soot onto your neighbor's house. Ignore his complaints. 7. Once a month, take all major appliances apart and then reassemble them. 8. Raise the thresholds and lower the headers of your front and back doors so that you either trip or bang your head every time you pass through them. 9. Disassemble and inspect your lawnmower every week. 10. On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, turn your water heater temperature up to 200 degrees. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, turn the water heater off. On Saturdays and Sundays tell your family they use too much water during the week, so no bathing will be allowed. 11. Raise your bed to within 6 inches of the ceiling, so you can't turn over without getting out and then getting back in. 12. Sleep on the shelf in your closet. Replace the closet door with a curtain. Have your spouse whip open the curtain about 3 hours after you go to sleep, shine a flashlight in your eyes, and say "Sorry, wrong rack." 13. Make your family qualify to operate each appliance in your house - dishwasher operator, blender technician, etc. 14. Have your neighbor come over each day at 5 am, blow a whistle so loud Helen Keller could hear it, and shout "Reville, reville, all hands heave out and trice up." 15. Have your mother-in-law write down everything she's going to do the following day, then have her make you stand in your back yard at 6 am while she reads it to you. 16. Submit a request chit to your father-in-law requesting permission to leave your house before 3 PM. 17. Empty all the garbage bins in your house and sweep the driveway three times a day, whether it needs it or not. (Now sweepers, sweepers, man your brooms, give the ship a clean sweep down fore and aft, empty all [Donahue, Tom JW1344] trashcans over the fantail.) 18. Have your neighbor collect all your mail for a month, read your magazines, and randomly lose every 5th item before delivering it to you. 19. Watch no TV except for movies played in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one. 20. When your children are in bed, run into their room with a megaphone shouting that your home is under attack and ordering them to their battle stations. (Now general quarters, general quarters, all hands man your battle stations.) 21. Make your family menu a week ahead of time without consulting the pantry or refrigerator. 22. Post a menu on the kitchen door informing your family that they are having steak for dinner. Then make them wait in line for an hour. When they finally get to the kitchen, tell them you are out of steak, but they can have dried ham or hot dogs. Repeat daily until they ignore the menu and just ask for hot dogs. 23. Bake a cake. Prop up one side of the pan so the cake bakes unevenly. Spread icing real thick to level it off. 24. Get up every night around midnight and have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on stale bread. (midrats) 25. Set your alarm clock to go off at random during the night. At the alarm, jump up and dress as fast as you can, making sure to button your top shirt button and tuck your pants into your socks. Run out into the backyard and uncoil the garden hose. 26. Every week or so, throw your cat or dog in the pool and shout "Man overboard port side!" Rate your family members on how fast they respond. 27. Put the headphones from your stereo on your head, but don't plug them in. Hang a paper cup around your neck on a string. Stand in front of the stove, and speak into the paper cup "Stove manned and ready." After an hour or so, speak into the cup again 'Stove secured." Roll up the headphones and paper cup and stow them in a shoebox. 28. Place a podium at the end of your driveway. Have your family stand watches at the podium, rotating at 4 hour intervals. This is best done when the weather is worst. January is a good time. 29. When there is a thunderstorm in your area, get a wobbly rocking chair, sit in it and rock as hard as you can until you become nauseous. Make sure to have a supply of stale crackers in your shirt pocket. 30. For former engineers: bring your lawn mower into the living room, and run it all day long. 31. Make coffee using eighteen scoops of budget priced coffee grounds per pot, and allow the pot to simmer for 5 hours before drinking. 32. Have someone under the age of ten give you a haircut with sheep shears. 33. Sew the back pockets of your jeans on the front. 34. Every couple of weeks, dress up in your best clothes and go to the scummiest part of town. Find the most run down, trashiest bar, and drink beer until you are hammered. Then walk all the way home. 35. Lock yourself and your family in the house for six weeks. Tell them that at the end of the 6th week you are going to take them to Disney World for "liberty." At the end of the 6th week, inform them the trip to Disney World has been canceled because they need to get ready for an inspection, and it will be another week before they can leave the house. Burl Burlingame ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 5) From: andrew jones Subject: ex HMAS Jervis Bay Just to let anyone who is interested, the ex HMAS Jervis Bay/Joint Venture Incat appears to be back at Garden Island...from what i could see it has the Joint Venture USN serial number painted on the hull , so if you are interested to get some photos of her..unfortunately, since i changed jobs i cant sneak down at lunch time to take any photos of Garden Island..oh well its a price to pay regards Andrew Jones Sydney Oz Ps also good luck to any SMML Sydney siders that are close to any of the bushfires around Sydney this week..hopefully we can get some rain really soon to help out the fire fighters ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 6) From: Jon Warneke Subject: Re: Accuracy of the ship's plans (or accuracy of condemnation of ship plans) Hi All, I have a simple question for our resident critic of all that is involved in ship modeling. What exactly are your sources for these statements? Saying that things are "pure fantasy" without providing any relevant sources, although par for the course, is suspect. I would hope these judgements are made from primary sources (actual builders plans, original photographs, etc) rather than from tertiary sources (magazine articles, word of mouth, photocopied pictures). Just like to know... Jon Warneke ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 7) From: Bradford Chaucer Subject: Re: Decal Paper >> Can anyone tell me where ink jet decal paper can be ordered other than the above? << Also Papa Tango decals http://www.tangopapadecals.com/ Regards, Bradford Chaucer ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- TRADERS, ANNOUNCEMENTS & NOTICEBOARD ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1) From: Subject: WTB: Airfix 1/72 Vosper Hi All, I am looking to buy one of these kits if anyone has one spare. Thanks, Chris Australia ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2) From: "shaya" Subject: 1/400 Hoods We have an ample supply! http://www.modelshipbuilding.com/400hood.htm Shaya Novak Naval Base Hobbies www.modelshipbuilding.com ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3) From: John Snyder Subject: Re: Allied Coastal Forces V1 & V2.... ...are both in stock at WEM. Best, John Snyder White Ensign Models Home Page for WEM, http://WhiteEnsignModels.com ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Check out the SMML site for the List Rules, Backissues, Member's models & reference pictures at: http://smmlonline.com Check out the APMA site for an index of ship articles in the Reference section at: http://apma.org.au/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- End of Volume